Where It All Began...

"When I was in kindergarten I fell in love. Her name was Alison. She had blond hair and blue eyes and she was the cutest girl in in our class. I pulled out all the stops. For weeks I made her little gifts in art class and gave her my deserts at lunch. She would smile and say thank you. This made me happy. Then one day when we were going out to recess and I looked around for her. There, on the swings sat Alison and next to her was my friend Frank. They were holding hands. My heart sank. But who could blame her? Frank was the most popular boy in our class. He was the best kick ball player and could outrun anyone in a race. All the girls liked him. Especially Alison. My heart was broken.

As time went on I came to terms with the reality that I was not an object of desire for the love of my five year old life. Eventually I did find someone for me. Her name was Monique and she was cute but not as cute as Alison. Neither was she as thin. Don't get me wrong, she was cute enough for the average little boy but not for me. I still wanted what I felt I deserved dammit! But all this got me was ridicule from both Alison and all the other kids in my class. Monique was not happy and she dumped me. I crawled inside a shell and never truly recovered. This episode which happened at a very early age set the pace for the rest of my life with women. At the age of five I learned that I was not good enough for the girl I loved."

A few years ago I was at a friend's house and she asked me to tell her a story about my life that she had never heard. I told the story above and she sat in stunned silence for a few moments. Finally she told me that that story answered so many questions about me. I guess it's true. Eventually I am going to write the book about my troubled love life. I've had the title for years: True Confessions of a Second Rate Sex Symbol. I have many, many more stories that follow a similar path to that story from my early life. Who knows, maybe I'll find the answers I'm looking for in that tome.